Genesis 2:24 says, “Therefore man shall leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” With this verse God instituted the basis of the marriage relationship.
Marriage is God’s idea and should reflect the way God loves the church. The love of God is unconditional – God loves you no matter what and you should love your spouse in the same way.
The covenant made between husband and wife when they get married will hold them together through the highs and lows of marriage and any trials they may face.
One of the happiest days of my life was the day I married my husband. It was after we both turned our lives back over to the Lord and committed ourselves to living by His word that we knew we were meant to be husband and wife.
By continuing to follow Him and turn to Him with life’s decisions our marriage will continue to be a blessed one. Of course there are hurdles we face and we will continue to face, but when we pray about them, both separately and together, and continue to support one another, the Lord will carry us over them to continue on the path He has planned for us.
I have learned one thing we need to banish from our marriage and our minds are negative thoughts. Negative thoughts cause worry, stress and bad feelings where they don’t need to be. God doesn’t want us to worry. He will take care of all of our needs.
If you think negatively, then negative things will happen. If you claim victory over those parts of your life, then you will overcome.
Rich has told me not to think or speak negatively or even talk to other people with negative thoughts on a situation – to just pray about and claim that victory that is our gift from God. (Are you starting to see why I am so blessed to have him as a husband?)
Another thing marriage teaches us is to put other people’s needs before our own. If you have a list of priorities in your life God should be at the top and our spouse should be second.
One of the things that brings me the most joy in my marriage is to do things for Rich to make his life easier and make him happy. He does just as much for me as I do for him, but it really wouldn’t matter because when we are serving in a Godly manner it doesn’t matter if it isn’t reciprocated – it will still bring us joy.
What matters is thinking of his needs and desires as well as our own. We have to put aside our selfishness. If we are focusing only on our own wants we will have an unbalanced, and probably unhappy, marriage. We have to support one another. We have to realize how valuable our spouse is in both our view and in God’s view.
I look at my husband as a gift from God, to be the one beside me during my lifetime to share the trials and triumphs, to be a companion, a helper and a spiritual leader for our family. I thank God each and every day for bringing him into my life.
Matthew 19:5-6 says, “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Monday, July 25, 2011
The light in the midst of shadows
We all go through trials in our lives – some big and some small. They aren't fun and they aren't easy but if we learn to turn to the Lord as we go through them they help us grow stronger in our faith and work on other areas of our lives that may need some serious work or just some fine tuning.
There are times when it seems like everywhere we turn there is something else coming at us. It has not been an easy couple of months and there is still more to come. It is still July but already I am looking forward to the end of August. I told Rich Sunday that I know we all have trials to go through but I didn't think we were supposed to go through 20 at the same time (ok, so maybe it is really 5 or 6 not 20 but I am prone to exaggeration at times).
Finally I got to a point where I just closed off everything around me and concentrated on being alone with the Lord. I saw a vision of me standing in a circle with bright light shining down from above on me and a few feet around me and shadowy figures in the darkness around me. The shadowy figures were the things Satan has been trying to use against me. God was saying to me through the vision, "As long as you look to me you will be in the light. Everything that tries to come against you will just be an insignificant shadow. I will keep you safe."
The trials are still there but with the Lord's help I will get through them. We will finish moving and get the house in order, the kids will get registered in and be fine with starting a new school, the grown boys have to make their own decisions and my only job is to pray for them and be there to support them whether I agree with the decisions or not, finances will improve, the job situation will be worked out and the medical tests will come back with a clean bill of health. I am believing for all of these things and know that the Lord will come through and work miracles where needed. He always does.
There are times when it seems like everywhere we turn there is something else coming at us. It has not been an easy couple of months and there is still more to come. It is still July but already I am looking forward to the end of August. I told Rich Sunday that I know we all have trials to go through but I didn't think we were supposed to go through 20 at the same time (ok, so maybe it is really 5 or 6 not 20 but I am prone to exaggeration at times).
Finally I got to a point where I just closed off everything around me and concentrated on being alone with the Lord. I saw a vision of me standing in a circle with bright light shining down from above on me and a few feet around me and shadowy figures in the darkness around me. The shadowy figures were the things Satan has been trying to use against me. God was saying to me through the vision, "As long as you look to me you will be in the light. Everything that tries to come against you will just be an insignificant shadow. I will keep you safe."
The trials are still there but with the Lord's help I will get through them. We will finish moving and get the house in order, the kids will get registered in and be fine with starting a new school, the grown boys have to make their own decisions and my only job is to pray for them and be there to support them whether I agree with the decisions or not, finances will improve, the job situation will be worked out and the medical tests will come back with a clean bill of health. I am believing for all of these things and know that the Lord will come through and work miracles where needed. He always does.
Thursday, July 21, 2011
Friends are uplifiting
Yesterday was my birthday. I was a bit down about it actually. First because I turned 42 - I have not liked thinking about my age since it passed 39. Also because we have spent the last week moving and are all just worn out and it has been much more expensive then we expected.
But I woke up to about a dozen birthday wishes on my Facebook page by 7 a.m. and they just kept coming throughout the day. To know that you are thought of and cared about by so many people is so uplifting. It reminds you that those times when you feel alone, you really aren't. There are plenty of people who care about you. And even when they aren't around, God is always there. He is the one who gives us those friends and family that are here for us.
The rest of the day went pretty well. My nephew is spending a couple of weeks with us and I took him and my youngest, Zach, to see Transformers 3D. It was fun to spend time with them. We have been so busy with the move and work that I haven't really had much time to spend with them since they got here Friday. Then we went home and I cooked supper. (Usually my southeast Texas self would say dinner but my husband has informed that an informal evening meal is supper and dinner is a formal evening meal so I am trying to do better!) Rich brought me home a beautiful card then we ended the day at church. A time of praise and worship allowed me to put aside all of the petty things that we sometimes allow to build up in our minds and realize just how much the Lord has blessed me. He has given and continues to give me all I need. It turned out to be a pretty good day after all.
But I woke up to about a dozen birthday wishes on my Facebook page by 7 a.m. and they just kept coming throughout the day. To know that you are thought of and cared about by so many people is so uplifting. It reminds you that those times when you feel alone, you really aren't. There are plenty of people who care about you. And even when they aren't around, God is always there. He is the one who gives us those friends and family that are here for us.
The rest of the day went pretty well. My nephew is spending a couple of weeks with us and I took him and my youngest, Zach, to see Transformers 3D. It was fun to spend time with them. We have been so busy with the move and work that I haven't really had much time to spend with them since they got here Friday. Then we went home and I cooked supper. (Usually my southeast Texas self would say dinner but my husband has informed that an informal evening meal is supper and dinner is a formal evening meal so I am trying to do better!) Rich brought me home a beautiful card then we ended the day at church. A time of praise and worship allowed me to put aside all of the petty things that we sometimes allow to build up in our minds and realize just how much the Lord has blessed me. He has given and continues to give me all I need. It turned out to be a pretty good day after all.
Moving can be a test of faith and patience
Have you ever heard people say that if a couple can make it through a move they can make it through anything? I always wondered about that. I mean after all isn’t a move usually a happy time? You are moving into a new home and a new beginning to another chapter of your life.
Well, after spending the last few days trying to get moved, I now understand the sentiment. It has taken a lot of patience, effort, strength and, most of all, prayer. We have gone through quite a few trials in a short period of time that have shown me some of the areas in my life that I need to work on such as patience, faith, trust and forgiveness.
Making the decision to move was not an easy one. We didn’t move far, in fact we are closer to both of our jobs, but it does require several changes in our lives and our boys’ lives. It is not a decision we reached lightly. We spent quite a bit of time in prayer over it and put our trust in God to lead us in the right direction. So even though it has been difficult, I know it is the place the Lord wants us to be right now.
The difficulties started with trying to get the electricity turned on at the new house. When it wasn’t turned on the day it was supposed to be we called the electric company to find out why. It turns out the electric box had been tampered with and there was a lock put on the electrical service at that address. After several phone calls and some paperwork we were finally able to get the electricity on a week later than expected. That one tested both patience and forgiveness. It took patience to deal with the process and have to delay our move.
I had to work hard at finding forgiveness for the people who tampered with the electric box in the first place. They were less than honest and we dealt with the repercussions of their decision. Saying you forgive someone and actually forgiving them are two different things. Sometimes you may even think you have forgiven someone but if you still have lingering anger and hard feeling, you haven’t truly forgiven them. That is a lesson I have been working on for a while – learning to truly forgive as we have been forgiven.
Colossians 3:13 says, “Bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, if any man has a complaint against any; even as Christ forgave you, so you also do.”
Finally we got moved in over the weekend. We have since found a few electrical outlets that aren’t working, I had water spray out from under the kitchen sink when I was washing dishes and washing a load of clothes almost flooded the house. My husband and two of my sons spent hours working on the plumbing issue. At one point I was helping my husband and finally said I thought maybe the pipes just needed some prayer and that I was claiming victory over the plumbing. Well, there are still a few issues but I can now wash dishes and wash laundry. Put your faith in God and he can do anything – even fix your plumbing!
What I have learned is that yes, moving is hard and stressful. By the end you are tired, sore and have been tested. But if you put your faith in the Lord, if you trust Him to lead you and help you through all of the trials you face, if you spend time together in prayer, you will survive the move with your marriage not only intact, but even stronger.
1 Corinthians 10:13 says, “God is faithful, and he will not let you be tested beyond your strength but with your testing he will also provide the way out so that you may be able to endure it.“
Well, after spending the last few days trying to get moved, I now understand the sentiment. It has taken a lot of patience, effort, strength and, most of all, prayer. We have gone through quite a few trials in a short period of time that have shown me some of the areas in my life that I need to work on such as patience, faith, trust and forgiveness.
Making the decision to move was not an easy one. We didn’t move far, in fact we are closer to both of our jobs, but it does require several changes in our lives and our boys’ lives. It is not a decision we reached lightly. We spent quite a bit of time in prayer over it and put our trust in God to lead us in the right direction. So even though it has been difficult, I know it is the place the Lord wants us to be right now.
The difficulties started with trying to get the electricity turned on at the new house. When it wasn’t turned on the day it was supposed to be we called the electric company to find out why. It turns out the electric box had been tampered with and there was a lock put on the electrical service at that address. After several phone calls and some paperwork we were finally able to get the electricity on a week later than expected. That one tested both patience and forgiveness. It took patience to deal with the process and have to delay our move.
I had to work hard at finding forgiveness for the people who tampered with the electric box in the first place. They were less than honest and we dealt with the repercussions of their decision. Saying you forgive someone and actually forgiving them are two different things. Sometimes you may even think you have forgiven someone but if you still have lingering anger and hard feeling, you haven’t truly forgiven them. That is a lesson I have been working on for a while – learning to truly forgive as we have been forgiven.
Colossians 3:13 says, “Bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, if any man has a complaint against any; even as Christ forgave you, so you also do.”
Finally we got moved in over the weekend. We have since found a few electrical outlets that aren’t working, I had water spray out from under the kitchen sink when I was washing dishes and washing a load of clothes almost flooded the house. My husband and two of my sons spent hours working on the plumbing issue. At one point I was helping my husband and finally said I thought maybe the pipes just needed some prayer and that I was claiming victory over the plumbing. Well, there are still a few issues but I can now wash dishes and wash laundry. Put your faith in God and he can do anything – even fix your plumbing!
What I have learned is that yes, moving is hard and stressful. By the end you are tired, sore and have been tested. But if you put your faith in the Lord, if you trust Him to lead you and help you through all of the trials you face, if you spend time together in prayer, you will survive the move with your marriage not only intact, but even stronger.
1 Corinthians 10:13 says, “God is faithful, and he will not let you be tested beyond your strength but with your testing he will also provide the way out so that you may be able to endure it.“
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
Cool news
I had one of my columns published on a Christian writers website yesterday with an offer to publish my weekly columns. I'm pretty excited about that. I have been working for the newspaper for almost eight years and have had plenty of articles and photos published, including my columns for the past few months but to be published as a Christian writer is new for me. It is the direction my life is moving in and I am happy about it. If anyone wants to check it out you can go to worthfinding.com and look for my profile.
Thursday, July 14, 2011
Attitude of happiness is a choice; joy is a gift
At home with my family on July 4 I was filled with an abundance of peace and happiness. We were getting ready to leave on a vacation with two of our boys to San Antonio. A whole week off of work and the first real vacation we have taken in a long time made me a happy person.
Even though I felt at peace the day was not been perfect. It started with the dogs demanding a walk as soon as I got up in the morning during which time I discovered one of the young turkeys that have been moved into temporary housing outside had escaped.
Walking dogs and chasing turkeys, at least I got a nice workout this morning.
My oldest was obsessing over his lack of employment, we have a visitor who is not one of my favorite people and Rich had a migraine.
I could have taken all of these things and consider the day a wash out. But I chose not to let these things get me down.
I believe attitude is a choice. You can choose to be happy or you can choose to let circumstances get the best of you. We all have things happen in our lives that can cause us to be unhappy, but through Christ we have the power to choose happiness.
Psalm 144:15 says, “Happy are the people who are in such a state; Happy are the people whose God is the Lord!”
Believing and having faith in the Lord will give you a spiritual contentment that helps you through the hard times in life. Commitment to the Lord fosters a Christ-like response to the events of life.
You have to learn to find happiness in everything you have been given instead of focusing on what has been taken away or is not given. You must believe that God will always work for your good. He is perfect. If you follow where He leads and are in His will, you will find true happiness.
Romans 8:28 says, “ And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.”
What we have to remember is that the Lord gives us peace and joy as free gifts. We just have to accept them. If someone offered you a $100 bill, free and clear, would you tell them “nah, I don’t want that.” Probably not.
Well the Lord is offering you happiness. I know I am taking it. I’m sure not going to tell Him that I don’t want it, that I don’t want to be happy.
But when you walk around with negative attitude and an unhappy demeanor, that is exactly what you are doing – telling God you don’t want the gift of happiness.
When you are filled with God’s love and accept His gifts it shows through to where everyone around you can see it. It is obvious through your actions, words and attitude. It makes other people around you want some of what you have. They want to be filled with the Spirit just like you.
If you aren’t filled with the love of the Lord, well that shows too.
Is that the impression you want to leave? Do you want to be known as the person everyone avoids because of a negative, poor me attitude? Or do you want to be the person everyone wants to be around because your love for the Lord and his love for you shows through everything you do?
It’s your choice. Choose your will or choose God’s will.
Even though I felt at peace the day was not been perfect. It started with the dogs demanding a walk as soon as I got up in the morning during which time I discovered one of the young turkeys that have been moved into temporary housing outside had escaped.
Walking dogs and chasing turkeys, at least I got a nice workout this morning.
My oldest was obsessing over his lack of employment, we have a visitor who is not one of my favorite people and Rich had a migraine.
I could have taken all of these things and consider the day a wash out. But I chose not to let these things get me down.
I believe attitude is a choice. You can choose to be happy or you can choose to let circumstances get the best of you. We all have things happen in our lives that can cause us to be unhappy, but through Christ we have the power to choose happiness.
Psalm 144:15 says, “Happy are the people who are in such a state; Happy are the people whose God is the Lord!”
Believing and having faith in the Lord will give you a spiritual contentment that helps you through the hard times in life. Commitment to the Lord fosters a Christ-like response to the events of life.
You have to learn to find happiness in everything you have been given instead of focusing on what has been taken away or is not given. You must believe that God will always work for your good. He is perfect. If you follow where He leads and are in His will, you will find true happiness.
Romans 8:28 says, “ And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.”
What we have to remember is that the Lord gives us peace and joy as free gifts. We just have to accept them. If someone offered you a $100 bill, free and clear, would you tell them “nah, I don’t want that.” Probably not.
Well the Lord is offering you happiness. I know I am taking it. I’m sure not going to tell Him that I don’t want it, that I don’t want to be happy.
But when you walk around with negative attitude and an unhappy demeanor, that is exactly what you are doing – telling God you don’t want the gift of happiness.
When you are filled with God’s love and accept His gifts it shows through to where everyone around you can see it. It is obvious through your actions, words and attitude. It makes other people around you want some of what you have. They want to be filled with the Spirit just like you.
If you aren’t filled with the love of the Lord, well that shows too.
Is that the impression you want to leave? Do you want to be known as the person everyone avoids because of a negative, poor me attitude? Or do you want to be the person everyone wants to be around because your love for the Lord and his love for you shows through everything you do?
It’s your choice. Choose your will or choose God’s will.
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Vacation
I started this blog with the intention of posting something daily but I haven't done very well with that. Last week I was on vacation with the family and not able to post because either I had poor internet connection or, and I will admit this, I just forgot.
I wrote a column last week but since I wan't in the office I emailed it in and it just so happened that email was down at the office and so the column did not make it in time for Wednesday's paper. I don't post the columns here until they are published. I'm back at work now though so everything will get back on track.
You know the email thing was just the first of several trials I went through last week. Vacations are supposed to be a time of refreshing but I think this one ended up being more a time to see what areas in my life I need to work on. Patience, faith, trust and forgiveness were four things worked on with me.
I was frustrated over the column not getting here since I had taken time on Monday, the first day of my vacation and a holiday, to write it and make sure it was sent. Tuesday afternoon I am out of town with my family and getting terse emails asking if I was going to have a column. As far as I knew it was already received. It was over four hours after the email was sent asking me about it before I received it and by then too late to get it in, even though I did resend it. That started my work on patience. I tend toward perfectionism. If something is supposed to be done, I do it, and when I am accused of not doing it, well, that is where my patience was really tested.
We are also in the process of moving. Moving is expensive and vacations are expensive. That is where trust was put into play. Trusting that the Lord would provide all we need for everything we need to do. It's been a bit tight, but we were able to take the boys on vacation, are still moving and are still be able to provide for our family. God is pretty amazing like that.
A situation that has tested patience, faith and forgiveness came up Friday. We had arranged for the electricity to be turned on in the house we are moving in to on Friday. By Friday evening it still wasn't on. When we finally get through after about 45 minutes on hold, patience test number 1, we find out the renters who had been living there tampered with the electrical box - twice - and there was a lock put on the electrical service at that address. The first woman with the electrical provider was extremely rude and appeared to be blaming us, patience test number 2, so we asked to speak to a supervisor. Turns out there is now a process we have to go through proving we weren't the ones living there when the box was tampered with in order to have our electricity turned on. That one takes patience - we are still waiting for the forms and have no idea how long this will take, forgiveness for the people who lived there before and were less than honest since we are now dealing with the repercussions of their actions, and faith that it will all work out.
I'm not sure how refreshed I am after that vacation, but I have definitely been working on some areas that needed strengthening.
1 Corinthians 10:13 - "God is faithful, and he will not let you be tested beyond your strength but with your testing he will also provide the way out so that you may be able to endure it"
I wrote a column last week but since I wan't in the office I emailed it in and it just so happened that email was down at the office and so the column did not make it in time for Wednesday's paper. I don't post the columns here until they are published. I'm back at work now though so everything will get back on track.
You know the email thing was just the first of several trials I went through last week. Vacations are supposed to be a time of refreshing but I think this one ended up being more a time to see what areas in my life I need to work on. Patience, faith, trust and forgiveness were four things worked on with me.
I was frustrated over the column not getting here since I had taken time on Monday, the first day of my vacation and a holiday, to write it and make sure it was sent. Tuesday afternoon I am out of town with my family and getting terse emails asking if I was going to have a column. As far as I knew it was already received. It was over four hours after the email was sent asking me about it before I received it and by then too late to get it in, even though I did resend it. That started my work on patience. I tend toward perfectionism. If something is supposed to be done, I do it, and when I am accused of not doing it, well, that is where my patience was really tested.
We are also in the process of moving. Moving is expensive and vacations are expensive. That is where trust was put into play. Trusting that the Lord would provide all we need for everything we need to do. It's been a bit tight, but we were able to take the boys on vacation, are still moving and are still be able to provide for our family. God is pretty amazing like that.
A situation that has tested patience, faith and forgiveness came up Friday. We had arranged for the electricity to be turned on in the house we are moving in to on Friday. By Friday evening it still wasn't on. When we finally get through after about 45 minutes on hold, patience test number 1, we find out the renters who had been living there tampered with the electrical box - twice - and there was a lock put on the electrical service at that address. The first woman with the electrical provider was extremely rude and appeared to be blaming us, patience test number 2, so we asked to speak to a supervisor. Turns out there is now a process we have to go through proving we weren't the ones living there when the box was tampered with in order to have our electricity turned on. That one takes patience - we are still waiting for the forms and have no idea how long this will take, forgiveness for the people who lived there before and were less than honest since we are now dealing with the repercussions of their actions, and faith that it will all work out.
I'm not sure how refreshed I am after that vacation, but I have definitely been working on some areas that needed strengthening.
1 Corinthians 10:13 - "God is faithful, and he will not let you be tested beyond your strength but with your testing he will also provide the way out so that you may be able to endure it"
Sunday, July 3, 2011
It's not God's fault
Nothing is God's "fault." He does not "trick" you. He does not "have it in" for you. He is perfect. He cannot lie. He cannot sin. He will never fail you.
These are all things Rich and I have said over and over the last few days to my oldest son. He is getting frustrated in the hunt for a job after graduating from college and instead of turning toward God he is taking a turn away from him. He seems to think that just because he has a college degree now he should just be able to walk into the perfect job. Wow, don't we all wish it was that way. But in today's economy - and he was a economics major so he should know - that isn't how it works. Things are tough.
The only way to get through life's trials is through faith in God. I went through a time in my life where I didn't think I would ever be happy again. Guess what? God put me in a better place than I could ever imagine. Is my life perfect? Nope. Far from it. But I have learned there is nothing in my life God won't get me through. He is always there. All I have to do is turn to him and ask. I have more peace and joy in my life now, then I have ever known. Things that would have once seemed like mountains to climb are now just hills to walk over. Peace and joy are gifts offered to us by God. All we have to do is reach out and take them and they are ours.
It hurts to see my son going through a time of such turmoil but I am trusting in God to pull him through. He has to know that him not finding a job yet isn't God's fault, maybe he just isn't following the direction the Lord is leading him or listening to what the Lord is telling him. Rich and I are here to support him and pray for him, and pray with him if he wants, but it is up to him to trust the Lord to get him through this.
These are all things Rich and I have said over and over the last few days to my oldest son. He is getting frustrated in the hunt for a job after graduating from college and instead of turning toward God he is taking a turn away from him. He seems to think that just because he has a college degree now he should just be able to walk into the perfect job. Wow, don't we all wish it was that way. But in today's economy - and he was a economics major so he should know - that isn't how it works. Things are tough.
The only way to get through life's trials is through faith in God. I went through a time in my life where I didn't think I would ever be happy again. Guess what? God put me in a better place than I could ever imagine. Is my life perfect? Nope. Far from it. But I have learned there is nothing in my life God won't get me through. He is always there. All I have to do is turn to him and ask. I have more peace and joy in my life now, then I have ever known. Things that would have once seemed like mountains to climb are now just hills to walk over. Peace and joy are gifts offered to us by God. All we have to do is reach out and take them and they are ours.
It hurts to see my son going through a time of such turmoil but I am trusting in God to pull him through. He has to know that him not finding a job yet isn't God's fault, maybe he just isn't following the direction the Lord is leading him or listening to what the Lord is telling him. Rich and I are here to support him and pray for him, and pray with him if he wants, but it is up to him to trust the Lord to get him through this.
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